You Gave Me All Your Love in One Day
05.05.05 - 12:24 a.m.
There are some things going on in private that are generally unhappy, but there are also finals that I'm either freaked out over what will the grade be, or freaked out over taking tomorrow. My plan is to go to work and study for a good solid 3 hours or so before the test, which will probably improve my chances on passing. That is what I would like to do mostly in this class: pass. Anything over that is pure gravy.
Today my brain died. I was pretty un-awesome in general today. My goal was to get a bunch packed, but all I did was box up most of my dvds and also pack up the xBox. those things can go home Friday, along with the TV and its shelving. I would like to send this computer, too, and all of its ancillary parts... I think I'll have to call my mom and have her bring some tubs. I don't want to move everything in garbage bags...
What's weird about the end of the year is that everyone is all stressed and hypersocial, but with waaayy less time to just hang out. I am looking forward (kind of) to moving home- I think I'll be able to fall in to more of a routine. I hope so, at least.
Today, in addition to two finals, also included another whirlwind internship application/rejection cycle. I called the lady, line was busy, I email standard "Hi I like you and I have cool stuff let's be friends" letter (except regarding jobs and learning) with resume attached, then decide to call again, and the position was filled Thursday. Today is Wednesday. Omaha is out of the loop or something on this sort of "Find Alexis a Job" field. I was already thinking about being in DC for the summer, how great it would be, and how things would be a bajillion times better then... and then the sky fell, and I realized I'm going to be in Omaha for the summer, she's going to be in DC, and that is all there is to it. I do know that tomorrow afternoon, me, my calendar, and hopefully this summer's employer will be sitting down to hash out the delicate scheduling dance. The thing is is that my jobs that I've ever had include the sort of flexibility, where if I don't want to work Fridays, I don't. Also, if I don't want to work one week, that's never been a problem. I am not a model employee. I mean, I get my work done and I'm clean and I stay out of any office politics, but really I like being detached and, yes, slightly aloof. I am concerned that this summer dealie won't afford me that same freedom.
The deal is is that I would like to visit DC at least twice. If possible, sometime around my birthday (or shortly after), and then again for the BIGDAY. I am cooking up plans for the BIGDAY, I mean nothing definitive yet, but I am thinking about it, which is probably a couple months in advance for me. I am nervous about the summer- what if everything falls apart and I can't pick it up? what if everything doesn't fall apart, but just disintegrates? I worry, and then I get cranky. damnit.
One of the things I like to do in the summer is nothing, and I hope to achieve quite a bit of that in the upcoming months. I would also like to hang out with some people around Omaha, and also maybe go camping a couple times. That is something I haven't been doing lately, and that is sad. I would like to stop sitting inside so much playing on the internets, and go outside more. Right now, I am going to go to sleep. I have a final to bomb tomorrow, and a job to hash out.
